"Bleh.."

I’ve been so out of it lately. Some days I feel nice and my pain isn’t as severe, but other days it becomes such an annoying tension that I can’t seem to get anything done. I’m also running out of the pain killers, which sucks. I have like 3 more days tops. That scares me cause I feel I need to them to go to bed. : (

Maybe it’s all in my head. Perhaps I have been letting all the little things irk me so easily. Like, these days KC has been acting like such an a-hole. They say cats will let you live longer, but these days it feels like KC’s just been taking away days out of my calendar. As I recover the dander and his fur seem to really bother me more than usual. I am not understanding what his problem is sometimes. or mine for that matter. He gets all the finest chicken, AquarYUMs, beef, and occasional salmon and egg with butter. He has had new toys and litter box since like the beginning of the Fall. Heck, he even has a girlfriend when he goes outside! (Yes, the first girl cat he has ever actually shared the backyard with and not gotten in a huge fight or gotten pissy over territory.) Even though that other cat is not mine, and is owned by the kid two or three houses down, I still leave out water for her. Anyhow, all this freedom and me being home 24/7 has gotten the Kaser Kat pretty spoiled. He doesn’t want to listen sometimes and acts like I’m an idiot. It’s true, he has this look like, “Fuck you, you’re not the boss of me bitch.” Urgh..

But again, maybe it’s just me. Maybe it’s all this recovering and waiting around that has being more exhausted, frustrated, and annoyed at everything around me. I can’t seem to sit down and draw or think of anything to do in terms of art. While that was to be expected, it still kind of sucks cause I just spend each day doing nothing after nothing. Funny I should say that, cause I am always talking about never wasting an opportunity, yet I’ve been doing that since late October.

Oh, well. Blah-blah, bleh..