That Charlie Scene..

..Has Got A Weenie That He Loves To Sshhooww.

Paintings, Batman R.I.P, and Watchmen

I’m currently in the beginning stages of doing two new paintings. (As you all know, I’m not big on painting at all.)

Obviously these paintings are for class.

The theme I am going to be centering these paintings around will be “deception.” ..and possibly throw in the idea of “sleep” (ya know, like “how” we sleep, “why” we sleep; things like that). Both ideas came from listening to a few episodes of Radio Lab. (You guys should give it a listen, you might like it.) Anyway, I’ll be showing off those in the coming weeks as I become closer to finishing them. (I hope they come out decent enough.)



So I’ve been patiently waiting for my Batman Graphic Novel, “R.I.P.” to come in the mail only to have it take FOREVER! I preordered my copy two weeks ago and it was shipped 7 days ago. I have the tracking number and it says it’s been stalled in Dallas since early morning Thursday! What gives?!

Sure it was a great deal (I got it at Buy.com), but come on.. I’ve never had a package take this long before. Urgh.



Anyhow, should I go and purchase the tickets for the midnight showing of Watchmen already? It’s gunna be a big event, I think I should. What do you guys think? Are any of you still interested in it since the trailer was unleashed at the beginning of The Dark Knight?

I guess I have been rambled enough for tonight. Seeya around!

See. Dee.

Perhaps it’s the season, but my more primitive thoughts are starting to take a hold of me. The idea of wanting to have somebody new by my side is becoming more and more of a nuisance. I guess we can’t really escape our elemental makeup of wanting to be with somebody.

Still, it sucks cock. I can’t help but always admiring her from a distance though. She’s a talented individual and I don’t think those around her realize that. There’s something inside her that’s just so much more unique. (..and not unique as in “indie-art chick” unique.)

But alas, to bring someone new into my personal life isn’t a very good idea at all. I can’t be bothered with a new girlfriend and no girlfriend should have to put up with me either. There is far to much at stake on both ends to risk. Besides, I wouldn’t really want to hurt anybody else ever again.

I just can’t help it. It makes me think about the entire notion and theory about “relationships.” I can’t understand this concept of dating and being with (the cliche') "special someone." After the end of my previous relationship, I don’t understand why anybody in their right fuckin’ mind would ever want to be in one. The perception and overall ideas about relationships are just so primitive and outdated to me. Why do people feel it necessary that they have to have somebody? I get that people are horny and want to fuck like rabbits, but you can do that with a quick Okcupid.com profile search. I’ve only visited that site once a few months ago but judging from all my friends who use the site to get laid it’s a massive buffet of horny men and women desperately seeking penis or vagina (sometimes both).

So why go out to crappy movies? Why the holding hands together? It’s so childish and just furthers the devolution of humanity.

..yet here I am, Mr. Cynical dumbass Chameleon; charmed and captivated by her presence and personality. Estranged, divided, and anxiously tense when she smiles back at me, I fear for my life.

Yes, this kid has a crush on somebody.

But it’s wrong. Oh, so very wrong! Just look at this e-motion: >_<
That’s how frustratingly angsty I’m feeling about this! (It looks like I’m having a hard time trying to take a shit. lol)

Regrettably, my vendetta is (and should be) my only somebody. As lonely as that sounds (and undoubtly retarded at that), it is the one thing I know that really matters. It is the only thing that makes any sense. Maybe one day, when I am finally finished with it all; I can lay asleep in bed, by her side, with a sense of lucidity, calmness, and clarity.. knowing all my dreams came true.

Though until then, I’m just going to have to deal with being human.

Dammit.

Welcome Back, Boys

I've missed you guys. I honestly though you'd never come back again. :D

..and lastly:



"21st Century Breakdown" the new Green Day album drops in May! WOO HOO!! XD

The Killers, Disses, and Benly the Dog

THE KILLERS

So this past Wednesday was the long awaited concert of The Killers at the Nokia Theater in Grand Prairie, Texas. Calling this show “fucking awesome” is an understatement. The show blew me away! I honestly had no idea what to expect. I consider myself a fan of The Killers, but not in such a way that I am a HUGE fan, ya know? I don’t own any of their albums, but I do listen to all 4 albums of theirs’ on average in my Zune since I became a pirate last year.




However, now after the show.. I have become an even bigger fan! Like, for realz n’ shyt. Brandon Flowers and his crew exceeded all expectations and them some! It was a fun-as-fuck concert. I danced all night and had a ball. They played all their great hits and songs. It was a great experience. This will definitely not be the last time I see them in concert. They are that good.




Needless to say, these past few days I have been listening to The Killers non-stop (sorry Lily Allen). I can’t get it out of my head it was just fun. FUN. FUN. FUN!! It was something I totally needed after a rather lame-ass day at school.




DISSES

Before the Killers concert, I had been having a long day. In my Painting II class (during “critiques”) my professor pretty much chewed up my latest painting; calling it “juvenile”, “very high school”, and “a bit too emo.” I didn’t really find it that offensive at the time. (Back at the Laredo Community College, Mrs. Bausman, Mr. Brown, and Mr. McInnis always warned/prepared us that critiques in major Universities and upper-graduate classes were going to be filled with much more penetrating and “at times” offensive comments.) They told us that some of our own classmates or major Art enthusiasts would tear our work apart (sometimes saying we have no talent at all). So I kind of already expected this kind of thing to happen.

This was my first critique at UNT and I knew a lot of the students had much more talent than I, so I was prepared to have some backlash against my art. Instead I found some of the students actually liked my painting. A lot of them really liked the color scheme and the very jagged-cross-hatching lines. (The professor thought I used acrylics, when in fact I had been using oils.)

Still, once when it was his turn to comment on my work he thought it was juvenile.

He felt the subject matter was too easy to figure out. I’ve done my fair share of autobiographical-abstract pieces but I didn’t want to be so abstract about this one (which still unnamed at the moment). But whatever, I guess.

It’s all good.

BENLY THE DOG

So, while Fausto is away for the weekend me and the Jamester are taking care of Benly, Fausto and Christy’s pet doggie. Pictured below:




It's been fun and chilled. Taking him on walks and looking after him.. even when he looks really bored and tired. Haha. Makes me miss my snobby and rebelious Kaser Kat back home. Hope all is good little one.

I need to start getting a few things together for next week. I believe it is going to be a busy week with tests, quizes, and papers to turn in. Time to buckle down.

So what are ya'll up to this weekend?

A new painting soon..?

I’ve been working hard on a “somewhat” mediocre painting for my Painting II class. It’s the autobiographical project our instructor assigned the first day of class. Not to kiss my own ass, but I like to think I’m pretty good at doing that since my entire body of work (both art and poetry) has always been loosely (if not extremely) autobiographical.


As you can undeniably tell from the JPEG posted above, I am not much of an experienced painter. What I lack in skill, I like to think I make up for in “raw passion.” (That probably says something about my sex life now that I think about it. lol!) Sometimes, that’s all you need to make really great artwork. I mean, sure it’s cool that you can create photo realistic paintings and drawings, but if there is no heart and soul then what’s the point? Am I rriigghhtt..? That’s why the White Stripes rule so much.

Come to think of it, they aren’t a great example since both Meg and Jack actually do have mad skillz. Oh shwell, you guys know what I mean. Right, Sex Pistols? -_^

Anywho, here is an audio clip of my favorite actor (ZOMG! CHRISTIAN BALE!!) getting extremely angry at some n00b who can’t do his job right. Judging from what is said, I think the dumbass might be this guy.

Now for a sweaty photo of Christian Bale..


Thank me later! Buh-bye.

“My Love Is Vengeance..

..and that’s never free.”

Townshend said it best, I think.

I honestly thought I had let go that one night, but maybe I haven’t. I was right about a lot of things, and while it’s hard to swallow, I really wished I was wrong about so much. I wished things were back to the way they used to be. I wish those I despised went back to their old lifestyles to become substance abusers and misogynist pigs. If I could choose to make them one way or the other, I would much rather have a few broken hearts at a dingy bar or hotel, than to have him gain so much power over various communities.

I’d like to move on. Believe me, if there was a sure way to move on, I would take it in a heartbeat. But my personal vendetta has evolved to a point where I don’t think I would be able too. There is to much at stake to simply “let go” or “get over it.”

But alas, this lonely vengeance in my head has gotten me nowhere. I am well aware that it has cost so much more pain and aggression. My past relationships were never successful because of it, and due to this, it is one of the many reasons I avoid even trying to seek new ones.

A lot of time, energy, and anger has been spent trying to correct the wrongs of my past and now that I have a chance to finally bury the hatchet.. I’m at a loss of words. They’re so many people who live their entire lives never once getting the opportunity to actually (physically, mentally and spiritually) “let go“, and now that I have it..

..it has become more of a series of questions. A “lesson”, if you will. After it all, did I learn anything? Am I satisfied with myself now given the situation and information that I uncovered? Was it all worth it? So much time, so much potential spent on trying to desperately find some kind of clarity to how I felt.. was it in vain? ..or is the person in the mirror happy with himself?

If not, then what can make that individual happy? Is it the love of his family? The love he has for his friends? None of it seemed to ever matter before while I was lost in within my own grudges. I took for granted those who actually cared about me, trying to find those who didn’t. Am I a fool for doing so..? If you knew, and could see through it all.. would you do the same?

I can sit here and challenge those who don’t know to try and walk a mile in my shoes, but I don’t think it’d make a difference.

I just don’t know right now. I don’t really care for anyone’s comments nor am I looking for some kind of advice, let alone sympathy so don’t even bother. This is for me and me alone.

It always has been that way.